Here’s some inspiring advice from Jen, aka Mum in the MadHouse, about how be more postitive when your kids are demanding your attention.

What is your most used word on a daily basis?  I recently realised that mine was “No” and it made me think about what would happen if I tried saying yes for a change.

When my boys finish school the first thing they say is “Can we go to the park Mum?” Usually I automatically reply “No”, before even thinking about it, but recently we have been making the most of the good weather and I have been saying “Yes”. 

What a difference it has made! The boys run off some of their energy and I get to have an hour in the sun, sometimes chatting with other mothers, sometimes just sitting reading a book; something I haven’t done for a long time. Yes, this takes a little forward planning, but in reality all I do is take a drink and a couple of pieces of fruit with me and they have a fantastic time and are much more settled for the rest of the evening.

“Can we play a board game Mum?” used to be greeted with a groan and a “let’s wait for your Dad to come home” (I hate board games) but over Easter I replaced that “No” with a “Yes! Which one?”  and the thing is, I am starting to like board games.  I still cannot win, my 4 and 6 year old beat me hands down each time, but we spend 30 minutes laughing at each other, or should that be the boys laugh and mock me for 30 minutes!

“Come play with me” is now met with a resounding “Yes” and I stop what I am doing (within reason) and spend some time with my children.  What I have found is that once I start playing with them, they are usually happy for me to disappear within 15 minutes and get on with what I was doing previously.

My life has been revolutionised. The boys no longer look for attention by creating or playing up, they come and ask for it and I am happy to give it most of the time. They understand when I am not available to them and they have started to say “excuse me Mummy, I know you are busy, but….” And that is often enough to just melt my heart and get me pushing them on the swing in the garden or chalking on the drive in front of the house with them.

So why not take up the challenge? Start one day with saying “Yes” instead of “No” and then come back and let me know how you got on.

With half term coming up soon, what a fab way to get in the mood! We’re going to give a BornFree Drinking Cup to one person who leaves their comment at the end of this post.

UPDATE 24/05/11 And the winner of one of our Drinking Cups is Katie! Congratulations x

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